Why blog?

It's therapeutic... specially for dorks like me who communicate better when they have the chance to process their thoughts, select their words, and write precisely what they want to say. As much as I'm a "talker", I stumble, stutter, and don't always say things right. English as a second language might have something to do with that (unfortunately, I don't think I could blog in Spanish... I lost my grammar in that language). I like to pour out my thoughts and leave it out there in the cosmos (or the world wide web) for other people to mull over...

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Praying and Waiting…

I guess I can officially say that I am terrified.  But like every season, there’s a time to be happy and there’s a time to be on your toes.  I guess God has this season for me to be on my toes in prayer.  I don’t really know.

While I can’t and won’t discuss details online, I will say that everything I’ve ever believed and thought I knew is being put to the test.  It’s like I’m being sifted, to see if I really do have absolute faith and reliance on my Lord and Savior or will that crumble under this test…. ?  And I’m sure many others have felt at this point under much more strenuous circumstances.  Under harder circumstances.

I just keep thinking of the song “Held” by Natalie Grant:

This is what it means, to be held
how it feels when the sacred is torn from life
and you survive…
this is what it is, to be loved
and to know that the promise was
when everything failed… we’d be held.
The real question is:  Will I still be holding on to God when this trial is through?  I hope I will be.  I pray I will be…
So in the meantime I went out with my family this Saturday, bargain shopping and picking up a few details we had done without for so long.  We had an enjoyable time and we drove by the Cook Inlet to get a glimpse of the waterfront:

I know God is at work in this scene; even though everything seems dead and uninhabitable, the scenery is still so amazingly beautiful and inviting.  I love Alaska.  And I know that like this picture, God is at work in the “winter” moments of my life.  It’s not in vain!

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